7 Years

The 7 year anniversary of my rape came and went this last week. On past anniversaries and the days leading up to them, I would find myself consumed with anxiety, sadness, anger and haunting memories of that night. It was like all those old feelings found a way to resurface again every July. But this year was different. I had remembered that the anniversary was coming up (I was raped on my mom's birthday, so the date has not easily been forgotten). But it wasn't more than a breif thought and I even had to pause for a minute and try to remember how many years it had been. When I figured out this would be 7 years, I couldn't believe it. I can remember it like it was yesterday.
July 17th came and went this year, and with out a single second spent remembering that night 7 years ago. It never crossed my mind. And I am so proud of that. I made the choice to forgive and move on and to not waste another minute of my life on someone who never even deserved that one night. And I gave more than just a night to him, I gave years. Years of being stuck and feeling ashamed and feeling like it was my fault. But not anymore. I am loving my life and living it to the max because that's what I deserve and that's what I want for myself and it is what my husband and children deserve from me, all of me all of the time.
ROAR was born to help other survivors get unstuck. It is my hope that you will realize that you deserve a life free of guilt and shame and full of love and forgiveness and PASSION. It is possible. And this 7 year anniversary has just reminded me that I am more than capable, we all are.
Love & Courage always.